Monday, March 13, 2006

The drunken inventor

Move over 'mini skirts', I have been introduced to the greatest invention in the history of mankind last night(misinformed masses even consider 'the wheel' as the one..........but lets face it ppl, when was the last time a wheel got u either dumbstruck or high???) and it is....(drumroll)..... "After drink"(AD).
Its an innocuous looking tablet with comes in a holding strip (free accessory) and in a lovely red pack (again totally free) which belies the miraculous properties it offers u. U pop one after every drink u have and.......vola.....absolutely no hangover the next day.Really!!!!! I woke up today morning with absolutely no P.M.P.S (Post Monthly Pubathalon Syndrome). Ok ..... my legs are still cramping up like mad and my back still aches as when in a brief flash of beer bravado, I tried the backflip which i was really good at appreciating during my college days......... thanks Abi for lifting me up and carrying me away from the dance floor b4 the scantily clad brood had a good look at the little guy with the weird side burns who suddenly got lost in the smoke(thank you smoke machine).
I am sure that AD is gonna revolutionize the whole system.........i.e- MY system by which I party only on thursdays and of course pubathalon days. But the tough part is to remember to pop a pill (dejavu anyone??)after every drink. The first two pints its ok.....but then it starts to get hazier..... So in the larger interests of the human race, i have decided to invent an after drink reminder (ADR).
Bye...bye roomie..... I am going to buy my penthouse at the Burj Dubai from the royalities of ADR. It is a complicated equipment and I will try my best to explain it in laymans terms for the non beeraholics......

ADR Components:

  1. A high quality shrink wrapping to protect the box
  2. A high quality box for the shrink wrapping to be wrapped around
  3. A high quality laminated card with instructions to be reminded of AD at every new order
  4. A high quality glossy printed disclaimer
  5. A high quality envelope with a 10 dirham note ( can be customised for various other currencies)
  6. A high quality picture of Yana Gupta in a swim suit

Inventors Note: I am sure that you have noticed the great importance I give to quality and am sure that you will be realize that the price is much lower than it should be.......... but thats me, always giving and giving.....

Usage Instructions:

  1. Carefully unwrap the high quality shrink wrapping
  2. Open the box from the side marked 'open' facing the east (Very Important... feng shui integration)
  3. Carefully take out the disclaimer and sign it.......absolving the inventor of any libel arising from any side effects or non performance of ADR
  4. Take out(carefully) the laminated card and the envelope and give it to the waiter attending to your table/barman if sitting at the bar(A different model also comes with multiple cards for crowded bars when different waiters might service......at a slightly higher cost of course)
  5. Carefully remove the Yana Gupta photograph and appreciate the design powers of the almighty
  6. Relax and enjoy the best buy u ever had.....

Distributors interested to be a part of the greatest invention in the history of mankind(the cynics will ask, 'its not AD anymore???'.....the formula is simple.....I=the greatest ever, therefore, my invention = the greatest ever) can please contact me at the earliest but I reserve the Saudi Arabian market for myself!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

6 Comments:

Anonymous maya said...

hav u tried it?:-) or are u lookin for scapegoats?

2:17 PM  
Blogger indianpeppone said...

I tried it yesterday and it surely works........cross varun's heart and hope he dies....

3:26 PM  
Anonymous maya said...

who is varun?

3:43 PM  
Blogger indianpeppone said...

A guy i used to know in college, who used to think of me as his personal punching bag........now i am just waiting for the lightning.....

4:01 PM  
Anonymous maya said...

i guess u r sloshed still????
no posts for today?

between wish u a happy holi!

1:17 PM  
Blogger indianpeppone said...

post is on the way on the reason y......

Happy holi to u toooooo

9:16 AM  

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